Zia Connects

Lately there has been huge news cast over and over, here in Albuquerque, NM. It is about a Native woman that had murdered her own son. It has been news casted repeatedly over and over. As a Native woman, myself I am trying to relate and understand. I feel as a Native woman walking around Albuquerque I am associated with her. And I feel that I need to represent her and defend my sister. It is so tough when our culture is portrayed in this light. As alcoholics and now murderers. I know each culture has its stereotypes and we all have to suffer through them. Now a huge new story seems to be making a new name for Natives and not in a good way. It upsets me that the bad news is always so much more appealing and therefore makes it so much harder for Natives to have a positive reflection of worth and a positive association in society.

My deepest sympathy goes towards the woman and her family. There are so many stressful situations in the world today and especially if you are Native. I am extremely lucky that I have both my parents in my life and they were both able to achieve higher education but we are still struggling. And many of my relatives on the reservation are struggling. It has become harder and harder for us because we have our traditional ways and yet have to live in a white world. Traditionally, the elders would be assisting with the children and helping a woman cope with motherhood. I am not trying to make excuses for the woman, but I am trying to understand the situation. In a perfect world, the grandmas, mothers and sisters would be taking care of the grandchild and the mother would be assisted. But, now our grandmothers are having a hard enough time providing for themselves and now it is extremely hard to be a single mother and live successfully. I am not sure what drove her to end her child’s life but I do know that this is not our way. Suicide is a huge problem with our culture and it seems that it is becoming easier and easier for our people to end a life rather than continue. It is a horrible truth. We need to reconnect with one another; I try to have my friends all together as often as I can, because when Natives spend time together we are a happier people.

My immediate thought when I heard of the little boys death was the mother suffered from Postpartum Depression. I know that, especially single mothers can struggle with the illness. There is no way to monitor the illness especially when our healthcare is not necessarily there for the Native people. There are so many what ifs and all I know is that this tragedy has the ability for each of us in the Native world to take a step in connecting. With our sisters, our mothers and our daughters. If you know of anyone that is raising a child alone, offer to help. Or even sincerely ask how they are doing. I am going to use this tragedy to move me towards making my connection projects a success. I have learned that one sincere comment to another goes a long way. Words are so important. By giving one compliment can go a long way. We as a people have to take this situation and make it, make us, take a step forward in preventing tragedy and create connection! Prevention is in our hands.